so

[miz_anneliese]

I'm going to Paris on Friday. Then Belgium, then England.

I have 2 days to figure out how the hell to curb my behaviour whilst I've been drinking.

Basically, I'm a flirtatious freak after a pint or 2. Which isn't a problem, when I'm dealing with people who are my work "equal".... especially if they've been out with me before. The problem is, my behaviour with the people who will be reporting to me. Now, I haven't crossed any lines, so get your minds out of the gutter; the problem is, I just don't know how to behave myself. I imagine that "mean drunks" have the same sort of problem. You can *know* what you did After The Fact, and you can *know* What Your Problem Was, but. How do you control it in the moment?

I give major props to someone who will likely never read this; who dragged me aside and implored that I think about my actions. I hope said person is willing to do it again, if it comes to that. I hope I have the strength to be myself without getting myself in trouble.

Comments

[scarybaldguy.livejournal.com]

Short and simple answer: don't drink.

Sorry to be a buzzkill, but that seems like your only option. If you can't control your behavior whilst imbibing, don't do it. If someone insists that you drink, they don't have your best interests in mind. If someone buys you a drink, refuse it. It may be socially awkward, but a helluva lot less embarrassing than the end result otherwise.

[miz-anneliese.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I know. I have controlled it, and had done so for a long time, so I'm not sure what happened that changed that.

[sadgirlseven.livejournal.com]

i've traditionally had a difficult time drinking with coworkers. the very idea of letting my guard down in front of them, potentially admitting things that i would NEVER admit in the workplace, or just being generally out of control in front of people who might report back to the person responsible for my employment (ie - my paycheck) has been enough to limit myself to a couple of drinks.

i'm not exactly sure what your situation is at work or what the culture is like, but i'd keep in mind that you can't necessarily assume that everyone works on the "what happens in belgium, stays in belgium" rule. i agree with the poster above that you might have to curtail the drinks in order to stay completely in check.

i have faith that you'll be okay. it just might take sacrficing the partying life while you're out of the country. hang in there. :)

**Ahem**

[mzollo77.livejournal.com]

Mommy advice......remember your mother tweaking your fiance's nipple whenever you think anything other than *1* beer on a full stomach seems like a good idea. Eh? (no, friendly readers, not the one she married, he's a nice boy...the one we had to have the nice policemen have a chat with.) Get it under control now sweetie-pie, or I'll introduce you to all my AA friends.

Love, Mom.

Re: **Ahem**

[miz-anneliese.livejournal.com]

Good thing to keep in mind, for sure :)

I'm getting there. I'm not happy with it, so thus, it has to change.

[lipsandwings.livejournal.com]

Oh I am so with you here. I am right there with you. Some things that have worked for me: writing a note and reading it right before I leave to go to wherever drinking will be had. A note with a reminder of what happened last time, the consequences, and just generally whatever will motivate you to act responsibly. The other thing that has worked is getting so fucked up that I'm sick for a day and I tell myself "I'm never doing that again" with real sincerity. That keeps me behaving well for at least a week, sometimes two. Other tricks involve things like forcing yourself to always drink 1 glass of water or juice to every glass of alcohol, to keep your pace a little slower, and just general reflection on what it is that you crave that makes you act more flirty when your inhibitions are lowered. If you can fulfill those cravings some other way, they won't be so likely to overpower you after your second pint.

I hope this is helpful. In my mind, not-drinking is simply not an option, but then, I am a total alcoholic. :)

[miz-anneliese.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the suggestions! I am *really* loathe to give up drinking completely, and it also irritates me when there's an aspect of my personality that's out of control. It's *me* - I should be able to have better control than that.

I was already thinking of doing the 1 glass of water to 1 glass of alcohol, but I really like the note idea. I work better when I've managed to embed something in my subconscious that even my drunken consciousness can't overwhelm.